Caption Contest – 606

Parts supplier

Thanks Mike (from Spain)

 

That landing bag is too small

That mat is too small

Thanks Mike (from Spain)

 

 
 

Bravest goat in the world

Brave goat

Thanks Mike (from Spain)

 

Go home R2D2…

Go home r2s2

Thanks sourpuss

 

Auto Oops

 Car oops

Thanks Ernie

 

Road Rage Starts Early

Road rage starts early

via

 

Friday Firesmith – Great Truths About Women

Friday firesmithWhen my friend Bill called me and told me a pine limb had fallen on his trailer and he needed help, fast, I knew what limb had fallen and what trailer it had landed on and I knew we had to do something fast. It’s a Guy Code thing; a friend calls with an emergency that includes beer and you have to go. I even got some beer on the way.
“How are we going to…” I started to ask.
“Tommy’s got a dump truck from his boss,” Bill said as we waded into the mess.
The trailer was one Bill and his wife, Colette, had lived in before they were married. They pinched pennies, clipped coupons and finally built a house, a very nice house, right behind the trailer. That was twelve years ago. But Colette refused to let Bill sell or move or destroy the trailer even though it began falling apart after a while. Their two kids had been conceived in that trailer and she couldn’t let it go. The massive pine limb had cut it in half. We tore it apart and tossed it in the dump truck and then, six hours later,  Bill called Colette at work to tell her what had happened. When she got home we had done an admirable job cleaning up. She sat in the spot where the trailer had been and wept like Judas.

Great Truth Number One: What women are attached to, women are attached to, and there is no separating them from it.

I once dated a woman who explained to me one night that she thought men were too fixated on sex. I nodded my agreement and the next night I made reservations at the best restaurant in town (no not the Waffle House, the other town) staked out a good movie, and even planned a midnight Planetarium show where there was to be star gazing. I knocked on the door, flowers in hand, and she met me wearing a towel and a leer.

Great Truth Number Two: Women want it when they want it and all you can do is roll with it.

Which leads us to…

There was a woman who had a much later work time than I so I was always up earlier than she. Every morning I would wake up, as men will do, snuggle up to her and she would tell me to back away slowly if I wanted to keep it. So after a while I took the early morning into a cool shower with me and that was that. But then one day, in tears, she asked me why I wasn’t as interested as I once was. In fact, she pointed out, I was never as happy to see her when I first woke up like I was at first. I pointed out she had threatened me with dismembership. “’Well,” she sniffed, “that doesn’t mean you have to quit trying.”

Great Truth Number Three: With women, contradiction and logic can flow seamlessly together.

This same woman threw a full-fledged fit about how long it was taking to get her photos back  from a photographer who had shot her sister’s niece’s best friend’s wedding. So while she was at work I went and talked to the man and he told me that he was doing the best he could and he would have them the next day. Okay. When she got off work I explained what I had done and she looked at me and said, “Whatever, thanks.”

Great Truth Number Four: What is important might not stay important. Check your watch.

And finally there was my friend Big Al and his wife Dottie, who was a tiny thing. The pregnancy had been very difficult but the baby arrived in good health. Dottie passed out, from the drugs or pain and when she awoke, Al, his brother,  and I were there talking about the baby. Dottie sat up and said, “Where is my F*ing baby?” This from a woman who never, ever, cussed. A doctor walked in and explained the baby was asleep and Dottie needed to rest. Dottie looked at Al and said, “You are going to take me to my f*ing baby.”

Great Truth Number Five: Lady Liberty wears a dress. Democracy does not. A woman alone is a majority around any number of men.

We got her into a wheelchair and she growled at me, “Push faster,” and I did. The doctor was trying to explain Dottie’s condition to her, Al was trying to hold her hand and keep up and finally we got to where the baby was and Dottie rose up out of the chair to pick her baby up for the first time. We helped as she allowed us to. “Take us home, Al!” Dottie commanded and that’s what happened, hospital regulations be damned.

The Great Truth of Motherhood: Respect it, fear it, but all means, revere it.

Take Care,
Mike

Mike writes regularly at his site:  The Hickory Head Hermit

Opinions expressed in this article are not necessarily those of the management of this site.

 

An interesting Friendship

Interesting friendship

Minerva in the Green-Wood Cemetery, Brooklyn waves at Lady Liberty in New York Harbor.

From

via

 

The List Is Long

 People to punch

Thanks sourpuss

 

Robots

Box

 Box explores the synthesis of real and digital space through projection-mapping onto moving surfaces. The short film documents a live performance, captured entirely in camera. botndolly.com/box

The Duel: Timo Boll vs. KUKA Robot

Cheetah Robot – Bound for robotic glory

Thanks Mark W

 

 
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