Beware the lonely old woman

A young man was walking through a supermarket to pick up a few things when he noticed an old lady following him around. Thinking nothing of it, he ignored her and continued on. Finally he went to the checkout line, but she got in front of him.

“Pardon me,” she said, “I’m sorry if my staring at you has made you feel uncomfortable. It’s just that you look just like my son, who just died recently.”

“I’m very sorry,” replied the young man, “is there anything I can do for you?”

“Yes,” she said, “As I’m leaving, can you say ‘Good bye, Mother!’ ? It would make me feel so much better.”

“Sure,” answered the young man.

As the old woman was leaving, he called out, “Goodbye, Mother!”

As he stepped up to the checkout counter, he saw that his total was $127.50.

“How can that be?” he asked, “I only purchased a few things!”

“Your mother said that you would pay for her,” said the clerk.

via

Mary Poppins – Practically perfect in every way

Adam was wandering around the garden of Eden all lonely and forlorn. He asks God to provide a mate. God says “I have the perfect solution – a woman. She will cook for you, clean for you, obey your every command and constantly respond to every beck and call”. Adam says “Fantastic! What will that cost me?”. The Lord replied “An arm and a leg”. Adam asked “Well, what can I get for a rib?” – and the rest is history

Thanks, Michelle!