Incredible footage of a Tornado hitting a bus in Poland August 15 has surfaced on YouTube, complete with the bus rolling over as the Tornado hits it. It appears too real to be fake, and news reports confirm the tornado in the area at the time. Just be happy you weren’t on the bus.
Racist penis joke
Three third-graders, a Jew, an Italian, and an African American are on the playground at recess. The Jewish kid suggests that they play a new game. “Let’s see who has the largest dick,” he says. “Okay,” they all agree.
The Jewish kid pulls down his zipper and whips it out. “That’s nothing,” says the Italian kid. He whips his out. His is a couple of inches longer. Not to be outdone, the African American whips his out. It is far the biggest, dwarfing the other two in both length and width. The Jewish and Italian kid are stunned and amazed. “Wow, that thing is huge!” they exclaim.
That night, eating dinner at home, the African American’s mother asks him what he did at school today.
“Oh, we worked on a science project, had a math test and read out loud from a new book …and during recess, my friends and I played “Let’s see who has the largest dick.”
“What kind of game is that, honey?” says the mother.
“Well, me, Sidney and Anthony each pulled out our penises, and I had the biggest! The other kids say its because I’m black. Is that true, Mom?”
The mom replies: “No, honey. It’s because you’re twenty-three.”
Blood sucking mosquitos
This is the adult of Culex pipiens, the world’s most common mosquito. Culex pipiens feeds itself by drinking floral nectar or the juices of rotting berries and other fruit. After mating, however, a female must obtain a rich dose of protein to finish the development of her eggs.
After withdrawing, she flies off tipsily, carrying blood amounting to two or three times her body weight. Then she finds a safe resting place. In a process taking at least 45 minutes, she releases the water content of the blood by passing it in pink droplets through her anus. After thus dumping needless weight, the mosquito flies away with proteinaceous solids in her gut that will nourish her eggs, which she lays in large numbers in rafts on the surface of water. The whole life-cycle of the female Culex mosquito, from hatching out of an egg to laying her own eggs, takes no more than three weeks.
KAZANGA!
An American dignitary was visiting a village in a poor African nation. Not certain of his welcome, he made a speech full of glowing terms to the natives gathered there.
“I bring you warm greetings from the people of the United States!” he declared, which was duly translated by the interpreter.
“Kazanga!” cried the natives.
“We wish this beautiful country peace and prosperity!” he continued.
“Kazanga!” yelled the natives, even louder.
“We hope this will be the beginning of many years of mutual friendship and economic benefit to both nations!” he went on.
“Kazanga! Kazanga!” roared the natives.
Later, as the dignitary was being escorted around the village by the chief, he commented, “That seemed to go well. They really do like us Americans, don’t they?”
“Uh, watch where you walk,” said the chief; “don’t step in the kazanga.”