The fly

Syrphid_fly_on_leafIn the dead of summer, a fly was resting on a leaf beside a lake. It was a hot, dry fly who said to no one in particular: “Gosh, if I go down three inches, I will feel the mist from the water and I will be refreshed.”

There was a fish in the water, thinking, “Gosh, if that fly goes down three inches, I can eat him.”

There was a bear on the shore, thinking, “Gosh, if that fly goes down three inches, that fish will jump for the fly and I will eat him.”

It also happened that a hunter was farther up the bank of the lake preparing to eat a cheese sandwich. “Gosh,” he thought, “if that fly goes down three inches, and that fish leaps for it, that bear will expose himself and grab for the fish, at which point I’ll shoot the bear and then have a proper trophy.”

You think this is enough activity for one bank of one lake? There is more.

A wee mouse down by the hunter’s foot was thinking, “Gosh, if that fly goes down three inches and that fish jumps for that fly, and that bear grabs for that fish, the dumb hunter will shoot the bear and drop his cheese sandwich.”

A cat lurking in the bushes took in this scene and thought, as was fashionable to do on the bank of this particular lake around lunch time, “Gosh, if that fly goes down three inches and that fish jumps for that fly and that bear grabs for that fish and that hunter shoots that bear, and the mouse makes off with the cheese sandwich then I can have mouse for lunch.”

The poor fly is finally so hot and so dry that he heads down for the cooling mist of the water.

The fish swallows the fly.

The bear grabs the fish.

The hunter shoots the bear.

The mouse grabs the cheese sandwich.

The cat jumps for the mouse.

The mouse ducks, and

The cat falls into the water and drowns.

The moral of this story is:

Whenever a fly goes down three inches, some pussy is probably in danger.

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13 thoughts on “The fly”

  1. looks like a fly to me… too short of a thorax to be a yellow jacket and the eyes/head are bigger than the thorax as well…

  2. There is a small lake in the country with a chain link fence dividing the lake into 4 quadrants. Quadrant A is filled with corn. Quadrant B is filled with catnip. In Quadrant C is a rooster, and Quadrant D a cat. The rooster flies over to Quadrant A, lands smack dab in the middle of the corn, and stuffs himself to total satiation. The cat, upon seeing the rooster’s nirvana, runs as fast as she can, attempts to jump over the lake, and splashes down into the middle. Moral of the story: for every satisfied c*ck there is a wet p*ssy.

  3. I stand corrected. Apparently there are flys that look like bees.

    “Bee Mimics

    Some flies, such as syrphids, masquerade as bees and wasps. However, the pollinating flies can be distinguished with a sharp eye. The flies have only one pair of wings while bees and wasps have two pairs of wings. Comical, robust and extremely hairy are the bee flies (bombylids), some with tongues as long as their bodies!”

    Learn something new every day.

  4. CA Kris – For years I’ve been considering writing one. I think I could make one that makes a lot of sense. I wish I’d have started when I first got the idea.

  5. No time like the present to get those ideas together. May I make a suggestion, a portion of it could be dedicated to “Man Law” (there is no need to explain that one, every man should know most of those).

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