TRANSLATING WOMEN’S PERSONAL ADS:
- * 40-ish………………………….49.
- * Adventurous……………………..Slept with everyone.
- * Athletic………………………..No breasts.
- * Average looking………………….Moooo.
- * Beautiful……………………….Pathological liar.
- * Emotionally Secure……………….On medication.
- * Feminist………………………..Fat.
- * Free Spirit……………………..Junkie.
- * Friendship first…………………Former Slut.
- * New-Age…………………………Body hair in the wrong places.
- * Old-fashioned……………………No B.J.’s
- * Open-minded……………………..Desperate.
- * Outgoing………………………..Loud and embarrassing.
- * Professional…………………….Witch.
- * Voluptuous………………………Very fat.
- * Large frame……………………..Hugely fat.
- * Wants soul mate………………….Stalker.
TRANSLATING WOMEN’S ENGLISH:
- * Yes…………………………….No
- * No……………………………..Yes
- * Maybe…………………………..No
- * We need…………………………I want
- * I am sorry………………………You’ll be sorry
- * We need to talk………………….You’re in trouble
- * Sure, go ahead…………………..You better not
- * Do what you want…………………You will pay for this later
- * I am not upset…………………..Of course, I am upset, you moron!
- * You’re attentive tonight………….Is sex all you ever think about?
TRANSLATING MEN’S ENGLISH:
- * I am hungry……………………..I am hungry
- * I am sleepy……………………..I am sleepy
- * I am tired………………………I am tired
- * Nice dress………………………Nice cleavage!
- * I love you………………………Let’s have sex now
- * I am bored………………………Do you want to have sex?
- * May I have this dance?……………I’d like to have sex with you.
- * Can I call you sometime?………….I’d like to have sex with you.
- * Do you want to go to a movie?……..I’d like to have sex with you.
- * Can I take you out to dinner?……..I’d like to have sex with you.
- * I don’t think those shoes go with that outfit…………..I’m gay.
Thanks Joe P
