Ralph, the chicken

ChickenRalph came home drunk one night, slid into bed beside his sleeping wife, and fell  into a deep slumber.

He awoke before the Pearly Gates, where St. Peter said,  ‘You died in  your sleep, Ralph..’

Ralph was stunned. ‘I’m dead? No, I can’t be! I’ve got too much to live for. Send me back!’

St. Peter said, ‘I’m sorry, but there’s only one way you can go back, and that’s as a chicken.’

Ralph was devastated, but begged St. Peter to send him to a farm near his home.. The next thing he knew, he was covered with feathers, clucking, and pecking the ground.  A rooster strolled past. ‘So, you’re the new hen, huh? How’s your first day here?’

Not bad,’ replied Ralph the hen, ‘but I have this strange feeling inside Like I’m gonna explode!’

 ‘You’re ovulating,’ explained the rooster. ‘Don ‘t tell me you’ve never laid an egg before? ‘

 ‘Never,’ said Ralph.

‘Well, just relax and let it happen,’ says the  rooster .  ‘It’s no big deal.’ 

 Ralph did, and a few uncomfortable seconds later, out popped an egg!  Ralph was overcome with emotion as he experienced motherhood. He soon laid another egg — his joy was overwhelming.

As he was about to lay his third egg, he felt a smack on the back of his head, and heard his wife yell………………. 
 
“Ralph! Wake up. You crapped the bed!”

Thanks Davey

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