10 bizarre job related illnesses

Fiddler1Here’s the least gross of them all:

Fiddler’s Neck
Likely when you think of a violinist you think of an orchestra, a bunch of people in tuxedos and how god awfully bored you’d be if you were sitting there watching a dude who likely has five cats playing violin for a couple of hours. Well, now you can add a new image to that picture in your mind: hideous growths.

Fiddler2The pressure of holding the violin against your neck leads to Fiddler’s Neck, a skin condition complete with scarring, cysts, and pustules. Play the violin long enough, and you can add hyperpigmentation and lichenification to the list.

So not only will you have a prolapsed anus growing out of your neck, but the skin will grow darker, bark-like and as thick as a lizard’s hide, only not as pretty. Part of the cause of Fiddler’s Neck has been attributed to poor hygiene, indicating what we always suspected; musicians are filthy.

Read the 10 bizarre job related illnesses

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Mother Nature has some weird evolutionary designs

1 Sea mammal blowhole. Any animal that spends appreciable time in the ocean should be able to extract oxygen from water via gills. Enlarging the lungs and moving a nostril to the back of the head is a poor work-around.

2 Hyena clitoris. When engorged, this “pseudopenis,” which doubles as the birth canal, becomes so hard it can crush babies to death during exit.

3 Kangaroo teat. In order to nurse, the just-born joey, a frail and squishy jellybean, must clamber up Mom’s torso and into her pouch for a nipple.

4 Giraffe birth canal. Mama giraffes stand up while giving birth, so baby’s entry into the world is a 5-foot drop. Wheeee! Crack.

5 Goliath bird-eating spider exoskeleton. This giant spider can climb trees to hunt very mobile prey. Yet it has a shell so fragile it practically explodes when it falls? Well, at least it can produce silk to make a sail. Oh, wait — it can’t!

6 Shark-fetus teeth. A few shark species have live births (instead of laying eggs). The Jaws juniors grow teeth in the womb. The first sibling or two to mature sometimes eat their siblings in utero. Mmm … siblings.

7 Human stomach. People can digest a lot — except for cellulose, the primary component of plant matter. Why don’t we have commensal bacteria in our guts to do it? They’re busy helping termites.

8 Slug genitalia. Some hermaphroditic species breed by wrapping their sex organs around each other. If one of said members gets stuck, the slug simply chews it off. What. The. Hell?

9 Quadrupeds. Let’s say you’re a four-footed animal. Now let’s say you get a wound on your back, or an itch, or a bug wandering up there. Tough luck, kid. You probably can’t do much about it. Hope there’s a low branch around.

10 Narwhal tusk. The unicorn-like protuberance on a male narwhal’s head is actually a tooth that erupts through the front of the jaw and keeps on growing, up to 9 feet. Narwhal: “Doc, I have a toothache.” Dentist: “Indeed.”

From B&P lurker Chaz’s site ThinkChaz.com

Note:  Either he has just started his website or I’m so stupid I can’t figure out how to go to the next page.