438 thoughts on “Contact Me”

  6. Hi Jonco,

    Hot on the heels of “You know you’re from Vegas when” I give you “You know you’re from Minnesota when…” I pasted the content into this comment and made some modifications to it. A link to the original source is at the bottom if you need to cite it.

    (And yes, I did the last item)

    You Know You’re from Minnesota When…

    You measure distance in minutes.

    Weather is 80% of your conversation.

    You recognize two seasons: Winter and Winter is Coming.

    “Down south” to you means Iowa.

    Snow tires came standard on your car.

    75% of your graduating high school class went to the University of Minnesota.

    You know more than 1 person that has hit a deer.

    People from other states love to hear you say words with O’s in them.

    You know what and where Dinkytown is.

    You have no problem saying or spelling Minneapolis.

    You hate “Fargo” but realize that a lot of your family has that accent.

    Your school has closed because of cold.

    You know what “Mille Lacs” is, and how to spell it.

    You understand wind chill.

    You assume when you say “The Cities,” people know to what you are referring.

    Two of your freeways have letters in their names.

    You eat boiled whitefish in lye at Christmas.

    You know the 2 sports-related reasons why we hate Dallas.

    Nothing gets you madder than seeing a Green Bay sticker on a MN car.

    You know what “uff-da” means and how to use it properly.

    You’re a loyal Target shopper.

    You’ve licked frozen metal.

    The only reason you go to Wisconsin is to fish or to buy beer on Sunday.

    You own an ice house, a snowmobile, and a 4 wheel drive vehicle.

    You wear shorts when it’s 50 degrees outside in March, but bundle up and complain in
    August when it goes below 60.

    You know people that have more fishing poles than teeth.

    Moon boots are an acceptable fashion accessory.

    It’s normal to wear a purple hat with horns and long braids.

    You have gone Trick-or-Treating in 3 feet of snow.

    You know what the word SPAM stands for (in more ways than one).

    You carry jumper cables in your car.

    You drink POP, not SODA.

    Every item at Thanksgiving dinner is white, except the cranberry sauce.

    You stand outside in -20 weather to watch a Christmas parade.

    In a conversation you heard someone say “yah, sure, you betcha” and you didn’t laugh.

    You know that Lake Wobegon isn’t real and you know who made it up.

    You voted for a pro wrestler for governor…and he won.

    Here is the original link: http://www.jokes-news.com/2007/05/26/you-know-youre-from-minnesota-when/

  14. Why there is a typo in Categories at the right of the page where you see the posts? It says Catagories, I noticed it a long time ago but thought that maybe it was like an inside joke and that is why you didn’t fix it. Just trying to help, love your page.

  15. Ok I have another one for you. This is 166 in the series “Is it a good idea to microwave this?”

    Basically J and J take items and microwave them to see what happens. Some are incredible, some are duds. They have been doing a few seasons of this now and I remember when they first started it. Alot of content here to take a look at, most run about four or five minutes so its easy to go through twenty in an hour.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TSajGdydZ3E

  27. MADISON, Conn. (Sept. 1) — A Connecticut man put his parents up for sale on Craigslist as a joke to pass the time on a rainy weekend.
    Michael Amatrudo, a 51-year-old Madison resident and insurance executive, says in the ad that he’s gotten “lots of use out of these guys over the past 50 years, but it’s time to move on.” He says he’ll take $155 or a trade for a younger set of parents, an Erector set or a “hot blonde.”
    Amatrudo says he’s gotten dozens of responses from around the country, including inquiries about who would pay the shipping cost and how many days it would take to receive them.
    He says his parents, Ed and Arlene Amatrudo of Noank, have a good sense of humor and took the ad in stride.

  40. My sister in law sent these to my brother …just thought your female readers might like them…tdc

    Why women win

    The Silent Treatment..

    A man and his wife were having some problems at home and were giving each other the silent treatment.

    Suddenly, the man realized that the next day,
    He would need his wife to wake him at 5:00 AM for an early morning business flight.

    Not wanting to be the first to break the silence (and LOSE), he wrote on a piece of paper,
    ‘Please wake me at 5:00 AM ‘

    He left it where he knew she would find it.

    The next morning, the man woke up, only to discover it was 9:00 AM and he had missed his flight.

    Furious, he was about to go and see why his wife hadn’t wakened him, when he noticed a piece of paper by the bed.
    The paper said, ‘It is 5:00 AM. Wake up.’

    Men are not equipped for these kinds of contests.

    WIFE VS. HUSBAND

    A couple drove down a country road for several miles,

    not saying a word.

    An earlier discussion had led to an argument and
    neither of them wanted to concede their position.

    As they passed a barnyard of mules, goats, and pigs,
    the husband asked sarcastically, ‘Relatives of yours?’

    ‘Yep,’ the wife replied, ‘in-laws”

    WOMEN’S REVENGE..
    ‘Cash, cheque or charge?’ I asked,

    after folding items the woman wished to purchase.

    As she fumbled for her wallet I noticed a remote control

    for a television set in her purse.

    ‘So, do you always carry your TV remote?’ I asked.

    ‘No,’ she replied, ‘ but my husband refused to come shopping with me, and I figured this was the most evil thing

    I could do to him legally.’

    UNDERSTANDING WOMEN..
    (A MAN’S PERSPECTIVE)

    I know I’m not going to understand women.
    I’ll never understand how you can take boiling hot wax,
    pour it onto your upper thigh, rip the hair out by the root,
    and still be afraid of a spider.

    W O R D S..

    A husband read an article to his wife about how many words women use a day…
    30,000 to a man’s 15,000.

    The wife replied, ‘The reason has to be

    because we have to repeat everything to men…

    The husband then turned to his wife and asked, ‘What?’

    CREATION..

    A man said to his wife one day, ‘I don’t know how you can be
    so stupid and so beautiful all at the same time.

    ‘ The wife responded, ‘Allow me to explain.

    God made me beautiful so you would be attracted to me.

    God made me stupid so I would be attracted to you !!!

    WHO DOES WHAT..

    A man and his wife were having an argument about who
    should brew the coffee each morning.

    The wife said, ‘You should do it, because you get up first,
    and then we don’t have to wait as long to get our coffee.’

    The husband said, ‘ You are in charge of cooking around here and you should do it, because that is your job, and

    I can just wait for my coffee.’

    Wife replies, ‘No, you should do it, and besides, it is in the Bible that the man should do the coffee.’

    Husband replies, ‘I can’t believe that, show me.’

    So she fetched the Bible, and opened the New Testament
    and showed him at the top of several pages,

    that it indeed says……….’HEBREWS’

    God may have created man before woman,
    but there is always a rough draft before the masterpiece..

    SEND THIS TO SMART WOMEN WHO NEED A LAUGH AND TO MEN YOU THINK CAN HANDLE IT!!!

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