Weather

Cold is a relative thing

by

65 ABOVE ZERO:

  • Floridians turn on the heat.
  • People in Iowa plant gardens.

60 ABOVE ZERO:

  • Californians shiver uncontrollably….
  • People in Iowa sunbathe.

50 ABOVE ZERO:

  • Italian & English cars won’t start.
  • People in Iowa drive with the windows down.

40 ABOVE ZERO:

  • Georgians do coats, thermal underwear, gloves, and wool hats.
  • People in Iowa throw on a flannel shirt.

35 ABOVE ZERO:

  • New York landlords finally turn up the heat.
  • People in Iowa have the last cookout before it gets cold.

20 ABOVE ZERO:

  • People in Miami all die.
  • Iowans close the windows.

ZERO:

  • Californians fly away to Mexico.
  • People in Iowa get out their winter coats.

10 BELOW ZERO:

  • Hollywood disintegrates.
  • The Girl Scouts in Iowa are selling cookies door to door.

20 BELOW ZERO:

  • Washington DC runs out of hot air.
  • People in Iowa let the dogs sleep indoors.

30 BELOW ZERO:

  • Santa Claus abandons the North Pole.
  • Iowans get upset because they can’t start the snow-mobile.

40 BELOW ZERO:

  • ALL atomic motion stops.
  • People in Iowa start saying: “Cold enough fer ya?”

50 BELOW ZERO:

  • Hell freezes over.
  • Iowa public schools will open 2 hours late.

Thanks Mike L

0

Snow donuts

by

Snow roll2It looks like the work of aliens, late-night pranksters or an as yet undiscovered animal building a nest.

But this strange-looking snow formation has a very natural explanation.

‘Snow rolls’ are cylinders of snow found in freezing conditions on open ground and most commonly appear on the prairies of North America.

Also known as snowrollers, snow bales and snow doughnuts, the phenomenon requires a precise balance of air temperature, ice, snow, moisture and wind. They are essentially a wintry version of tumbleweed.

Snow roll1

 
Thanks DJ
0

Blown away

by

TV stations love to send reporters out to report in severe weather. We’ve seen them doing live shots in hurricanes, blizzards, etc. Here’s one from KGW/Portland a couple of days ago during a wind storm with gusts that reached 100mph. The assignment desk sent one of their reporters, Keely Chalmers, to Crown Point, one of the highest spots in town, for a story on what it felt like to be in that much wind. They probably should have sent someone a little sturdier…

 via

0

Winter weather forecast

by

Winter forecastIt’s late fall and the Indians on a remote reservation in South Dakota asked their new chief if the coming winter was going to be cold or mild. Since he was a chief in a modern society, he had never been taught the old secrets.

When he looked at the sky, he couldn’t tell what the winter was going to be like. Nevertheless, to be on the safe side, he told his tribe that the winter was indeed going to be cold and that the members of the village should collect firewood to be prepared.

But, being a practical leader, after several days, he got an idea. He went to the phone booth, called the National Weather Service and asked, ‘Is the coming winter going to be cold?’

‘It looks like this winter is going to be quite cold,’ the meteorologist at the weather service responded.

So the chief went back to his people and told them to collect even more firewood in order to be prepared.

A week later, he called the National Weather Service again. ‘Does it still look like it is going to be a very cold winter?’ ‘Yes,’ the man at National Weather Service again replied, ‘it’s going to be a very cold winter.’  The chief again went back to his people and ordered them to collect every stick and branch.

Two weeks later, the chief called the National Weather Service again. ‘Are you absolutely sure that the winter is going to be very cold?’

‘Absolutely,’ the man replied,’ It’s looking more and more like it is going to be one of the coldest winters we’ve ever seen.’

‘How can you be so sure?’ the chief asked.

The weatherman replied, ‘The Indians are collecting a shitload of firewood’.

Thanks Gene

0