* It is the middle of the night (it’s not today and it’s not tomorrow)
* We are happy or stressed (corollary: Holidays of any kind)
* We are outside (especially when we are camping)
* It was on the plate of someone else (especially if it the plate of one of your children)
* It is consumed with diet pop
* We have actually broken a sweat (exercised) in the last 24 hours
* Our mother or grandmother made the food
* Our mother or grandmother has recently stressed us out and we made the food
* We are in the car and in a hurry
* It is some form of a salad
* We have recently had problems with members of the opposite sex
* We haven’t had problems or any attention from members of the opposite sex in a long time
* It includes whole grains (or is brownish at least)
* It is in liquid form of any kind (anything that can get through a straw is calorie free)
* It doesn’t taste very good
* You are in front of a TV or computer
* You are standing up (in front of the refrigerator)
* You are depressed
* It’s a free sample at a store
* It’s small and cute like an hors d’oeuvres at a cocktail party
* It is really fancy and well made and not something you get every day
* When wearing sweats or other expandable clothing
* When it benefits girl scouts or any other non profit
* When someone else is paying
Replace “calories” with “carbs” and it’ll be ok.
I always believed that if it’s broken (especially biscuits) then all the calories have leaked out!
bitscared – I love your theory so much I just ‘accidentally’ threw 2 bags of chocolate chip cookies against the wall…I’m pretty sure the calories are leaking out right now…nom nom nom!