Women over 50

60 Minutes Correspondent Andy Rooney (CBS):  As I grow in age, I value women over 50 most of all. Here are just a few reasons why:

·         A woman over 50 will never wake you in the middle of the night and ask, ‘What are you thinking?’ She doesn’t care what you think..

·         If a woman over 50 doesn’t want to watch the game, she doesn’t sit around whining about it. She does something she wants to do, and it’s usually more interesting.

·         Women over 50 are dignified. They seldom have a screaming match with you at the opera or in the middle of an expensive restaurant. Of course, if you deserve it, they won’t hesitate to shoot you if they think they can get away with it.

·         Older women are generous with praise, often undeserved. They know what it’s like to be unappreciated.

·         Women get psychic as they age. You never have to confess your sins to a woman over 50.

·         Once you get past a wrinkle or two, a woman over 50 is far sexier than her younger counterpart.

·         Older women are forthright and honest… They’ll tell you right off if you are a jerk, if you are acting like one… You don’t ever have to wonder where you stand with her.

·         Yes, we praise women over 50 for a multitude of reasons. Unfortunately, it’s not reciprocal. For every stunning, smart, well-coiffed, hot woman over 50, there is a bald, paunchy relic in yellow pants making a fool of himself with some 22-year old waitress. Ladies, I apologize..

·         For all those men who say, ‘Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?  Here’s an update for you. Nowadays 80% of women are against marriage.  Why? Because women  realize it’s not worth buying an entire pig just to get a little sausage!

Thanks Gene


6 thoughts on “Women over 50”

  1. I love that number 6 is basically saying “once you get past the ugliness they are really sexy!”

    Also, I find it hard to believe he would say the last one, it seems a bit risque for Andy, but who knows…

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  2. This piece has been circulating on the internet for years and is FALSELY attributed to Andy Rooney. Why do people keep propagating this junk? Don’t believe me? Check out Snopes.com

    Reply
  3. I have to agree with Andy here. My wife is more beautiful to me now than she was when we met. Unfortunately: well, let’s just say at least I don’t wear yellow pants.

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