I’ll be back this afternoon to post. Until then this is your chance to talk about whatever you want…. except politics.
How about embarrassing moments? What’s the most embarrassing mess you’ve gotten yourself into?
Stand up close to the microphone and speak clearly.
Good thought, Start us off Jonco.
My most embarrassing moment is way too embarrassing for a public post in the interweb.
Growing up a shy county boy, it took me a while to warm up to the opposite sex. One of my so call friends saw this and set me up with one of her friends on a blind date. The next Saturday night I picked her up at her house and was surprised as how pretty she was. Not what I was expecting. We decided to go to the local drive-in. After a while I got enough nerves to let my hands to explore a little. It didn’t take long to realize she had a extra-firm right leg. When she saw the look on my face she said “yes,it is artificial”. To say the least, I had a long talk with my friend the next day.
You mean worse than the email I was sending to a woman and accidentally sent you you, Jon?
Yeah, that was pretty bad, but it could have been much, much, worse
Yeah, that could have been a lot worse Mike…. or better…depending on your perspective.
Tehobu; Not a bad ‘Most Embarrassing moment of your Whole life’ to have had a blind date who sported an extra-firm Artificial leg..
Are you certain that you haven’t subconsciously repressed the memory that it was Actually an extra-firm Third leg?
(sorry. but it had to be said.. you were all thinking it.
lol ouch Mike, I want to know what you sent
I have two that I can talk about.
One when my kids were little, I was at J C Penny doing some Christmas shopping. At the end of one of the aisles they had this large display of some Fischer-Price toy set. It had like a zillion pieces and they were all displayed on this giant shelf. Thinking about getting this for one of my kids I just barely touched one of the pieces to look at it and the whole shelf goes crashing to the floor. What seemed like hundreds of pieces of plastic when flying, skating and bouncing across the floor as the shelf hits the floor making what seemed like the loudest crash I’d ever heard. Of course everyone turns around to see what all the commotion was about. I was mortified with embarrassment.
Two was about 1980. I was doing some wiring in a house I had. I had been drilling holes all day to fish the wiring inside the walls. I was really tired and my drill bit was getting duller with each hole. It was something like a 36 inch long bit for reaching way inside walls. It was the only long bit I had like that. I had to keep putting more and more pressure on the drill to get it through the wood. I was in an awkward position and had the drill up over my head and was putting a lot of my body into it to add pressure as I pulled down on the drill with my weight. Somehow, I put my head too close to the bit and something grabbed hold of a big hunk of my hair and the revolving drill just ripped out this big patch of my hair. I had this 2-3 inch long bald patch on my head. It hurt like hell when it happened, but nothing compared to the embarrassment I felt because of it. My hair was very curly in those days, so I had just put the ripped out hair onto a piece of double stick tape and slapped it onto that spot for a few weeks until it started growing back out.
Top that!
It was no fun explaining to people that my now-ex-boyfriend was my boyfriend BEFORE he became my stepbrother. People seemed to be under the impression that I was any less uncomfortable with it than everyone else or that I was like, “Hey dad, you should marry my boyfriend’s mom because I think that would be hot, and we could go on double dates and stuff!”
It was very awkward. I don’t foresee it becoming less weird in the near future, either.
The office that I used to work in had the womens and mens rooms next door to each other. One day, not paying attention I went strolling into the mens room and noticed that there weren’t any urinals. Yep, I was in the wrong one. The worst part was trying to leave the room without being noticed.
I went grocery shopping once and as I was loading my stuff in the car, I realized that none of the groceries were bagged. Nobody had noticed me “shop lifting”. Again the hardest part was trying to go back into the store without attracting attention.
Where is everyone this weekend? It seems as if we are missing Bella, Scott, KLAW, PaulinBoca, Maffu, ALN and others. Must be good summer weather everywhere (or good winter weather in Aussieland).
No one was put in charge!
Did you miss me? I just got a facebook account, so I have been there all day finding old friends. I had a MySpace account, but then I realized: “hey! I’m not 16 years old!” It’s amazing how many old friends you can find on a more adult oriented site.
Anyway, one embarrassing moment for me was when I was in my car with my son in a car seat in the back. We were sitting at a red light behind another car and the milisecond that the light changed to green I hear a little (or should I say, not so little!) voice in the back seat yell “Move it Asshole”! I wonder where he got that from? I’m just glad that the wife wasn’t in the car! I never would have heard the end of that one.
Too funny Another Scott. Thanks.
Sorry for your frustration Frustrated,,, but if she had had an extra-firm Third leg long enough to walk on as she did,I couldn’t have been able to subconsciously repressed the memory. Now go back to the basement and be a good little boy.
Ok,,,I’ll tell on myself.
April 1996, Lake in Weatherford, Texas. Hubby and I had been dating for a while when he decided we would go and camp out with the horses. He lived about 2 1/2 hours from me so I met him there. He took his horses and we spent the weekend visiting, riding horses, eating out at the camp fire. He had a new filly about 2 y/o and another horse called ‘Ole Big’. Was lots of fun!. I went home to the local bar telling everyone about my trip and had just said, “Phil let me ride ‘Ole Big’ all weekend.” The lips that fell to the bar still makes me smile, they had no idea I was talking about the horse, not Phil.
Lots of fun and GREAT riding, on ‘Ole Big’.
Another story to come about my ‘Goose’ horse, great team roper will come later.
Chris
MN
How about embarrassing moments?
Realizing I just watched the whole Cubs and Washington game.
First week working for City Bank,. 19 years old. All staff went to a Christmas Party and I had abt two or three sweet cocktails, then I can´t remember anything until I woke up on the Accountant´s bed and a few directors looking to me and saying: give her a shot, she is not fine…
Worst of it was to come back to work next monday! Everybody looking to me and I just waiting to be quit. Fortunately the Manager was a gentleman and even didn´t talk abt it! (I was very, very shy at that age)
Tehobu, how is watching the cubs game embarrassing… *shakes head*
Deborah, 11 to 3 and the Clubs wasn’t even playing well. I should have turn channel bottom of filth.
bottom of FILTH…. Intentional or not… that’s funny!
Going to the gym about four years or so ago. I was overweight and trying to do something about it. It was to be my first time at a new gym and I was being introduced to it the younger sister of a friend (you couldn’t just wander in and join).
Anyway, it was a stinking hot day outside and as you walked through the open door of the gym reception they had an air-con unit mounted above the door blasting cold air downwards.
As soon as that blast of cold air hit me, the muscles in my back went into spasm and I went over like I’d been poleaxed. Worse not only could I not move, but I couldn’t breathe and could only speak in a whistling croak. They had to call an ambulance for me.
When the ambulance came they lifted me onto the gurney, but, as I was rigid, I ended up face down, arse in the air. The asked me to turn over but I just couldn’t, it was too agonising to move so they threw me into the ambulance like that. And all the while people – some of whom I knew from around my area – were filing in and out of reception, seeing me on the floor and crowding round, while I wished I was someone else.
They finally got me to the hospital, still in that same face-down, arse-up position and wheeled me around the ward like that, much to everybody’s amusement.
Finally, a doctor came to examine me and the nurse told him that I’d been at the gym. Bending over so he could see my face, the doctor asked “which machine were you using when this happened?”
“None,” I replied, in a tiny breathless croak. “I didn’t actually get that far.”
I have never been back to that gym, nor, thankfully, to that hospital.
I just heard some very sad news. Frank McCourt, who wrote Angela’s Ashes, ‘Tis and Teacher Man just died at the age of 78. If you have never read his books, you owe it to yourself to read them. They are all fantastic, but Angela’s Ashes is one of the best books you will EVER read. Don’t bother with the movie though. It doesn’t come close to the emotional impact of the book.
His story begins: “Worse than the ordinary miserable childhood is the miserable Irish childhood, and worse yet is the miserable Irish Catholic childhood, People everywhere brag and whimper about the woes of their early years, but nothing can compare with the Irish version: the poverty, the shiftless loquacious father; the pious defeated mother moaning by the fire; pompous priests, bullying schoolmasters; the English and all the terrible things they did to us for 800 long years.”
Do yourself a favor and get to know the writings of Frank McCourt!
http://s222.photobucket.com/albums/dd134/The1apprentice/Cans/
Took these photos yesterday. Not really on topic, but I thought you guys might want to know about this phenomenon. You need to leave about a third of the coke in there for it to work.
Still waiting for august 23rd. I hope all readers here will help out. Especially Bella.
A L N, this is for you. http://www.farnorthphotos.com/
When I was a Cub Scout, we had a Halloween meeting which was a combination costume contest and meeting with the Boy Scouts. I had hoped to dress as a dowdy, frumpy old woman (apologies here to all the women reading this. Understand that this was in the early `60’s), but by the time my mom was done with me I eerily looked like Marilyn Monroe. The contest was won by another boy dressed as an old woman.
The next thing I knew, the Scout Master said “OK boys, change into your uniforms”, which I did not have. So I spent the rest of the evening at the Boyscout/Cubscout meeting in a slinky silver sequined dress…
isiah, I BELONG to the itty bitty titty club. How’s that gonna work?
should have drank more of that magic water…..
When I was about 8 or 9 years old, I was feeling a little queasy, but Mom took me grocery shopping with her anyway. “It’ll pass…you’ll have fun.” But I didn’t feel any better after getting to the store. I started getting the chills, and I told her I thought I might have to throw up. I guess she didn’t realize how imminent that was…she told me to take myself to the restroom (on the opposite side of a large store). On the way there, my stomach decided to go postal, and, not wanting to empty my stomach all over the nice shiny floor, I turned to the side, grabbed on to something metal and threw up everything I’d eaten since birth…right into the frozen foods cooler bin. I don’t remember anything after that…I either fainted or was knocked out by the frozen foods manager…
Intentional, no! But it is your fault Jon. You should have a misspoke checker on here.
Everything is my fault. It’s OK to blame me… I’m used to it. I’m married. 🙂
Another)Scot, I just found out as well about Frank McCourt, sorry to hear of it, and I agree with what you said about Angela’s Ashes. One of the best books I’ve ever read.
The story of his throwing up his first communion breakfast at his grandmother’s house was great, she drug him through the streets of Limerick telling everyone she met that he had “thrun up the body and blood of Jesus…and now I have God in me backyard.”
I laughed myself silly reading that.
A moment I’ll always remember was in fifth grade, Mrs Bramblett’s class. I needed her help with a math problem. I politely held up my hand and blurted out “Mama I have a question,” and until the room erupted with laughter I was clueless. She was nice about it though. She quickly said “how can I help son?”
DJ and Gary, I just want to pinch your cheeks. You are so cute.
(Pssst, Jonco… what is a misspoke checker?)(and who is miss poke?)
Bella, you have to keep up dear. I spelled fifth as filth. Jon caught it and kid me about it.Being filth is a word his spellchecker didn’t catch it. So he need a mis-spoke checker.
I caught “filth”. My spell checker doesn’t check your spelling, it has enough trouble trying to keep up with mine.
I not smrt, thank you tehobu? I thought miss poke was a stripper.
Got it, mis-spoke
Was totally playing basketball with my d**k hanging out. Of course it was the hot chick that pointed it out. And of course I was totally flaccid(sp).
I’m just totally guessing Heath that the Bball didn’t bounce?
My not so finest hour was when,back in high school after picking a fight had to walk back into a class of about 35 boys with two of the biggest black eyes i have ever seen.Lesson learned.
Oh and another time in high school i put my hand up and said to my maths teacher Mrs Forster,”Can you please explain how to do these stimulaneous (simultaneous) equations again”.Everyone laughed while i slowly died.
tdc, did ya see it coming?
I just realized in the future when become stuff voice activated and such, I won’t be able to be sarcastic towards the light switches and kitchen appliances.
As a honeymoon gift my sister and sister-in-law, gave us tickets for a hot air balloon ride. We got married in winter so the weather wasn’t right for ballooning and we postponed the flight for a few months. By the time our rebooked flight came around I was two months pregnant and not having the best time with morning sickness! I didn’t tell the pilot I was pregnant because I didn’t know if they would still let me go up and it was my third so I wasn’t to precious about the whole thing.
We get up and the pilot explains that people who suffer from travel sickness are always fine in the balloon because… I didn’t hear the rest because I was vomiting over the side and of course we had just finished passing over fields and were now over houses! Somebody handed me a bottle of water and I felt much better after a drink. After we landed and were folding up the balloon the pilot asks me if I was the one being sick. I explained that I was pregnant and felt much better now, thank you. He said that he had been piloting for over twenty years and he had never seen or heard of anyone being sick in a balloon. Good then! Ahh, the joy of motherhood!
I felt sorry for the couple jammed in beside us. They very politely pretended they didn’t notice my violent heaving and gagging as I tried valiantly to keep it in. A trip for everyone to remember!
lmao I wish we had a video of that
One time I was at a friends house and tried to do a handstand. I finally got it but my pals didn’t see so I tried it again. This time, my arms collapsed and I hit my head causing major rug burn on my forehead. They all laughed and I had a huge mark on my forehead for the longest time. I cut bangs just to cover it up. I was too embarrassed to tell people the real story so when someone asked, I just said I fell skateboarding.
So you know those racks that you can hang over your shower head that can hold shampoo soap, etc.? Well one day while I was washing my hair, my elbow bumped that rack causing things to fall, including a gillette fusion razor (may I add five blades on one side) which bounced onto my back, then slicing my butt cheek. Not just a little mark, but a few slices. My sister knocked on the bathroom asking what happened, she couldn’t stop laughing. I don’t keep a razor up there anymore after that.
There’s no shame in shaving your arse, Debs.
Ok, actually there is.