Real school absence excuses

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  • My son is under a doctor’s care and should not take PE today. Please execute him.
  • Please exkuce lisa for being absent she was sick and i had her shot.
  • Dear school: please ecsc’s john being absent on jan. 28, 29, 30, 31, 32 and also 33.
  • Please excuse gloria from jim today. She is administrating.
  • Carlos was absent yesterday because he was playing football. He was hurt in the growing part.
  • Megan could not come to school today because she has been bothered by very close veins.
  • Please excuse ray friday from school. He has very loose vowels.
  • Please excuse Lesli from being absent yesterday. She had diahre dyrea direathethe (shits).
  • Irving was absent yesterday because he missed his bust.
  • Sally won’t be in school a week from friday. We have to attend her funeral.
  • My daughter was absent yesterday because she was tired. She spent a weekend with the marines.
  • Please excuse Jason for being absent yesterday. He had a cold and could not breed well.
  • Please excuse mary for being absent yesterday. She was in bed with gramps.
  • Maryann was absent december 11-16, because she had a fever, sorethroat, headache and upset stomach. Her sister was also sick, fever an sore throat, her brother had a low grade fever and ached all over. I wasn’t the best either, sore throat and fever. There must be something going around, her father even got hot last night.
  • Please excuse brenda. She has been sick and under the doctor.

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3 thoughts on “Real school absence excuses”

  1. Hey, Jonco, you should consider just keeping this as part of your masthead. Well…not the whole post. Just the beginning:

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  3. My father was a high school teacher, he at one time had an excuse letter from one of his students who’s either father or mother was Japanese, can’t remember. He wrote his excuse letter all in Japanese and it was quite lengthy, but my father recognized the letterings from an instant noodle package.

    And another time, a student with an excuse letter written in ink, said, “Please excuse my son for not attending class, *he had diarryia diaria dia* (this whole section was crossed out) He was sick.”

    Funny times he had ahahaha.

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