The internet is like a penis

by

It can be up or down. It’s more fun when it’s up, but it makes it hard to get any real work done.

In the long-distant past, its only purpose was to transmit information considered vital to the survival of the species. Some people still think that’s the only thing it should be used for, but most folks today use it for fun most of the time.

It has no conscience and no memory. Left to its own devices, it will just do the same damn dumb things it did before.

It provides a way to interact with other people. Some people take this interaction very seriously, others treat it as a lark. Sometimes it’s hard to tell what kind of person you’re dealing with until it’s too late.

If you don’t apply the appropriate protective measures, it can spread viruses.

It has no brain of its own. Instead, it uses yours. If you use it too much, you’ll find it becomes more and more difficult to think coherently.

We attach an importance to it that is far greater than its actual size and influence warrant.

If you’re not careful what you do with it, it can get you in big trouble.

It has its own agenda. Somehow, no matter how good your intentions, it will warp your behavior. Later you may ask yourself “why on earth did I do that?”

Some folks have it, some don’t.

Those who have it would be devastated if it were ever cut off. They think that those who don’t have it are somehow inferior. They think it gives them power. They are wrong.

Those who don’t have it may agree that it’s a nifty toy, but think it’s not worth the fuss that those who do have it make about it. Still, many of those who don’t have it would like to try it.

Once you’ve started playing with it, it’s hard to stop.

Some people would just play with it all day if they didn’t have work to do.

via

0

55 thoughts on “The internet is like a penis”

  3. The bigger the speed the better, many people prefer a larger speed. Even as we speak scientist are inventing devices to enlarge it.

  6. UMMM, Kate you claim a penis has gotten you in trouble? In 200,000 words or less please expain, I have never heard of a penis misbehaving. dunno.

  8. Sometimes in the morning they are uncontrollable, but they soon calm down. DJ, sometimes you need to beat the snot out of them.

  10. I didn’t say IT was misbehaving…

    Ok, ok. My friend and I were at the storage place, moving some furniture, and…I was bending over or something, and he got a little excited. And public storage places are, in fact, quite public.

    It was totally worth it, though.

  22. AAAAAAHAHAHAHAHA! I win. I’ll see what I can do… I don’t exactly carrying around pictures of my tits…

  31. Dude, I got stabbed in the eye last time whipped cream was involved. Like, there was blood. And an outrageous amount of tequila.

    Oh hey! I found the picture of my sunburn!

  38. After further review, Kate is ahead by an RCH.I am a sucker for sun burned tits, the finalist will be awarded a small gift on 3-24.

  45. All I have to say is 16H and they taste like breast milk. They have also been so sunburnt I got a small scar. And there is a lizard tattooed between them. Not a trouser snake.

    No photos and Kate you can have the prize.

    Where’s Deborah? She is very fine!

  49. 42H DAYUM I would really love those thats all I would ever need…pics DAMN IT lets see those puppies you can keep them covered,Kate Im quessing c’s or d’s but they are DAYUM nice

Leave a Comment