Every morning men wake up to this catch-22: you desperately have to pee, but you have an erection, which makes it hard to urinate, but the hard-on won’t go away until you empty your bladder. It’s almost impossible to aim at the toilet when your penis is pointing the wrong way, so you end up peeing on the wall, the floor, or yourself.
You may have developed your own technique for dealing with this catch-22, but if not, here are some methods to take care of the aiming part, customized for the angle of your dangle.
Here’s just one way…
If you’re a man of steel in the morning, you might as well be a superhero. Tie on the bedsheet for a cape, mount the bowl in a single bound, and make like you’re flying. Hopefully the pressure relief will be like Kryptonite for your boner.
Thanks Brad
There is only one way – on that website they call it The Plank, but its true name is The Pythagoras Piss.
Also works well when just very drunk.
ok I will try it and let you know if it works,and yea it is really hard (lol) to take a leak
LOL! I find stuff like this fascinating! How do you guys handle those things?
Yeah the plank is the way for me, unless it’s warm enough, then I walk outside and let it rip
Just use the sink or the shower.
interesting scientific research…never though about it.
the plank work for me.
Bitscared, are you really asking a load of blokes how they handle their erections??
Gary, about the outside thing been there and done that
Not your erections! You doodles!
That would be your not you!
bitscared you can check mine out if you want to
Ribsy, the shower yes, I dunno about the sink though.. ahahah
What I find interesting, is the post directly below this one. Was that intentional Jonco?
mouth wide open and an erection above it…yes, clever and intentional.
LMAO!!! I would pay money to see someone attempt The Flying Wallenda.
Must see pictures.
Bitscared – I prefer to have a woman handle mine.
I’ve found that having a female next to me who is into “playing the flute” can make you forget all about having to pee. Oh He!! yeah…
i use the shower. aaahhh… much better.
This is another way
http://smallbitsandpieces.blogspot.com/2009/02/show-off.html
Matt, No that wasn’t intentional… just happened that way.
I get decent results with “The Fountain”: Stand three feet away and arc your stream high in the air. Approach and adjust angle as needed.
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🙂
I’ve always had pretty good luck with a bank shot off the light switch.
I have a very simple fix for this. In the morning, as I walk into the bathroom, I pull out my phone and look at a picture of your mom’s face. No more woody.
Lol. I bet Mrs DJ loves that.
I pee on the same tree the mutts use. Ah, country livin’!!!
Maffu – You probably wouldn’t be surprised to learn that Mrs DJ is now the EX-Mrs DJ.
Which solves many problems, but creates certain others, ifyaknowwhatImean.
Are you people that thoughtless, THE SHOWER!!!
I keep a five gallon bucket near where I sleep, what is an erection?
LOL @ KLAW again!
Cold cold cold shower for me, it works instantly and wakes you up as powerful as black tar coffee.
Okay, as a woman, I have to ask…you guys handle yourselves in other situations, why can’t you just grab said wood and aim towards the toilet?
Because it would hurt, you’ll break it if you bend it too far. It’s really stiff.
Damn straight!
LOL! PUN!
I have to stand back about 2-3 feet from the toilet so my piss stream makes it into the toilet from my throbbing erect penis!