Some new lingo to use when you’re on the golf course

Golf1A ‘Rock Hudson‘ – a putt that looked straight, but wasn’t

A ‘Saddam Hussein‘ – from one bunker into another

A ‘Yasser Arafat‘ – butt ugly and in the sand

A ‘John Kennedy Jr.’ – didn’t quite make it over the water

A ‘Rodney King‘ – over-clubbed
 
An ‘O.J.’- got away with one
 
A ‘Princess Grace’ – should have used a driver

A ‘Princess Di’ – shouldn’t have used the driver

A ‘Condom’ – safe, but didn’t feel very good

A ‘Brazilian’ – shaved the hole
 
A ‘Rush Limbaugh‘ – a little to the right

A ‘Nancy Pelosi‘ – Way to the left and out of bounds

A ‘James Joyce‘ – a putt that’s impossible to read

A ‘Ted Kennedy‘ – goes in the water and jumps out

A ‘Pee Wee Herman‘ – too much wrist

A ‘Sonny Bono‘ – straight into the trees
 
A ‘Mickey Mantle‘ – a dead yank

A ‘Paris Hilton‘ – a very expensive hole

Thanks Gene


15 thoughts on “Some new lingo to use when you’re on the golf course”

  1. A Barack Obama: Looks fantastic off the tee, then hooks hard left, and lands in a pile of horse crap.

  2. My Dad used to have some good ones.

    If you made a long putt for a double bogey he would call it, “whipped cream on dog sh*t”.

  3. A “Gerald Ford”- A drive that hits a tree, bounces off a spectator’s forehead, kills a bird in flight, ends up at your feet, and then you stumble over it.

  4. Shurely shome mishtake? A “Rush Limbaugh” must be something that veers out of control so far to the right that it departs from the golf course, and loses all contact with reality?

  5. The pro I learned from had so many one-liners

    From the outhouse to the penthouse [or vice versa]
    That shot will either be chicken salad or chicken sh*t
    You hit it stiffer than a minister’s d**k

  6. ‘The sister in-law shot’ – you’re up there but you know you shouldn’t be.
    ‘The Paula Radcliffe shot’ – ugly as f%$k but it’ll run all day
    ‘The hitler putt’ – one ball left.
    ‘The madonna putt’ – swings both ways

    There’s more but I can’t think of them right now

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