The amazing sex bet

Viagra pillsGambling and Sex are two terrible vices that mankind seemingly has quite a bit of interest in. Gambling is thrilling and carries with it the chance to make a large amount of money. Sex is sex, which is pretty sweet on its own. So why not combine the two? Sergey Tuganov thought he would have a go at living the impossible dream. Sadly, his inclusion in this article means it didn’t end well, so please don’t look up to this man as a source of inspiration.

Tuganov presented two women with a simple scenario: he could have continuous sex with them for twelve hours. If he could then he would win $4,300. If he couldn’t, then he would forever be remembered as a failure who got to sextify two women for several hours. Either way, win win. The women agreed, and the sex was had.

Before I continue with the conclusion, I’d just like to ask a simple question: what sort of person can have sex continuously for twelve hours? Oh sure, people talk about it as a joke or fantasy, but have you actually thought about what sex for twelve hours straight would feel like? I’m predicting that the sexy good times come to an end right about the time unpleasant things start to chafe.

Anyway, in order to ensure his victory of these two women and whatever force created him, Tuganov decided to down an entire bottle of Viagra, one pill of which is enough to ensure an erection for four hours. I’m guessing that Tuganov was terrible with numbers. To his credit, he managed to win the bet. To his discredit, his boner pills iced him only minutes later. I can only hope they were able to close the casket.

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Woman served wrong beer, tosses knife, hits child

SAVANNAH — A Garden City woman is in jail after authorities say she allegedly threw a knife during a fight over the wrong brand of beer, striking and seriously injuring a 3-year-old girl.

It’s unclear what charges Lorraine Bulloch faces. Garden City Capt. Al Jelinski says she was drunk when she got into an argument with her brother at 7:15 p.m. Wednesday after he came home with the wrong brand of beer.

Police say Bulloch allegedly picked up a knife and threw it at her brother, but he ducked and the blade ended up striking the 3-year-old in the head.

Paramedics rushed the little girl to Memorial University Medical Center with what Jelinski describes as serious injuries.

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Thanks KLAW

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Acquitted of weighing his gross-eries

ScaleA CUSTOMER yesterday walked free from court after being accused of using a supermarket’s fruit and vegetable scales to weigh his WILLY.

Shop assistant Melanie Guglielmino, 31, told the trial she was left “too shocked to speak” after reportedly seeing James Jones, 33, and another man expose themselves.

It was claimed Jones then told her they were “just trying to weigh” their privates.

The dad-of-three later admitted being drunk in the Edinburgh Scotmid store but denied the X-rated stunt last September.

And he was cleared yesterday after a four-hour trial at Edinburgh Sheriff Court.

Sheriff Neil MacKinnon said he was “unable to conclude the precise act took place”.

CCTV footage screened in court showed Jones standing on a stool by the scales, but with his back to the camera.

Ms Guglielmino told the court: “I saw two guys. One of them said ‘We are just weighing our private parts’ – but he used a different word. I was too shocked to speak.”

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Her boss Agnes Fagan, 45, showed the footage to police.

She said: “They got a stool and took it over to the scales and they looked like they had their penises out on the scales.”

After being acquitted, Jones said: “I don’t know if I’ll ever go back in that shop.”

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Thanks Janet

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