Age. Fac ut gaudeam.
Go ahead. Make my day.

Alanis horribulus.
That singer has too damn many personal issues.

Aio, quantitas magna frumentorum est.
Yes, that is a very large amount of corn.

(At a barbeque)
Animadvertistine, ubicumque stes, fumum recta in faciem ferri?
Ever noticed how wherever you stand, the smoke goes right into your face?

Anulos qui animum ostendunt omnes gestemus!
Let’s all wear mood rings!

Aquaductus non diuresis!
Don’t pee in the pool!

Atque memento, nulli adsunt Romanorum qui locutionem tuam corrigant.
And remember, there aren’t any Romans around to correct your pronunciation.

Auda similarum ad seattles.
They all sound just like Pearl Jam.

Aut discere aut disce.
Either learn or leave.

Bibere humanum est, ergo bibamus.
To drink is human, let us therefore drink.

Bodicus mutilatimus, unemploymi forevercus.
Better take the nose ring out before the job interview.

Boobi falsetti starrius.
Sugar, if ya wanna be a star, you’re gonna have to do something about that bustline.

Braccae illae virides cum subucula rosea et tunica Caledonia-quam elenganter concinnatur!
Those green pants go so well with that pink shirt and the plaid jacket!

Caesar si viveret, ad remum dareris.
If Caesar were alive, you’d be chained to an oar.

Canis meus id comedit.
My dog ate it.

Carpe Ductum
Seize the Tape!

Carpe trojana!
Grab the condoms!

Catapultam habeo. Nisi pecuniam omnem mihi dabis, ad caput tuum saxum immane mittam.
I have a catapult. Give me all the money, or I will fling an enormous rock at your head.

Cave Canem!
Beware of Dog.

Cave ne ante ullas catapultas ambules.
If I were you, I wouldn’t walk in front of any catapults.

Clamo, clamatis, omnes clamamus pro glace lactis.
I scream, you scream, we all scream for ice cream.

Cogito, ergo doleo.
I think, therefore I am depressed.

Cogito, ergo sum.
I think, therefore I am.

Corruptisima republica plurimae leges.
The more corrupt a republic, the more laws.

Credo Elvem etiam vivere.
I believe Elvis lives.

Credo nos in fluctu eodem esse.
I think we’re on the same wavelength.

Cum catapultae proscriptae erunt tum soli proscript catapultas habebunt.
When catapults are outlawed, only outlaws will have catapults.

De comedius non listus nomis uricani.
In matters of comedy, there can be no hurricane name lists.

De gustibus non est disputandum.
You mean you actually like chitlins?

De mortuis nil nisi boner.
Say nothing but good of the impotent.

Di! Ecce hora! Uxor mea me necabit!
God, look at the time! My wife will kill me!

Dictum ad tua mater.
Word to your mother!

Dictum, factum.
Said and done.

Die dulci fruere.
Have a nice day.

Diem perdidi!
I have lost a day! (Especially true on Friday!)

Domino vobiscum.
The pizza guy’s here.

Duc, sequere, aut de via decede.
Lead, follow, or get out of the way
.
Dumbassus! Hottie iste transvestitus!
Fool! That gorgeous woman is a crossdresser!

E Pluribus Tupac.
Rap is everywhere.

Erectionus finalum.
Anna Nicole Smith is here, Gramps.

Es debilem vinculum, vale!
You’re the weakest link, goodbye!

Estne volumen in toga, an solum tibi libet me videre?
Is that a scroll in your toga, or are you just happy to see me?

Et tu, Bubba?
Would you like fries with that, Mr. President?

Et tu, pluribus unum?
The government just stabbed me in the back!

Fac me cocleario vomere!
Gag me with a spoon!

Fac ut gaudeam.
Make my day.

Fac ut vivas.
Get a life.

Feles mala! Cur cista non uteris? Stramentum novum in ea posui.
Bad kitty! Why don’t you use the cat box? I put new litter in it.

Furnulum pani nolo.
I don’t want a toaster.

Gramen artificiosum odi.
I hate Astroturf.

Habetis bona deum.
Have a nice day.

Herpescum Dolores Es?
Have You Been Tested Recently?

Heu, modo itera omnia quae mihi nunc nuper narravisti, sed nunc Anglice?
Listen, would you repeat everything you just told me, only this time say it in English?

Hoc induto est fundus permagnusn?
Does my bum look big in this?

Hoc nomen meum verum non est.
This isn¹t my real name.

Hoc tempore non possum colloqui, sum in curru.
I can’t talk now, I’m on a train.

Hocine bibo aut in eum digitos insero?
Do I drink this or stick my fingers in it?

Hodie adsit, cras absit.
Here today, gone tomorrow.

Id est mihi, id non est tibi!
It is mine, not yours!

Id legi modo hic modo illic. Vero, Latine loqui non est difficilissimum.
I picked it up here and there. Really, Latin isn’t all that hard.

Id quot circumiret, circumveniat.
What goes around, comes around.

Ignoramus microsoftis multa pecunia dat.
Yeah, where *do* I want to go today??

Il guyus nissanem iste ickye.
That Nissan guy gives me the creeps.

Illiud Latine dici non potest.
You can’t say that in Latin.

Imus ad magum Ozi videndum, magum Ozi mirum mirissimum.
We’re off to see the wizard, the wonderful wizard of Oz.

In vino veni.
(You figure this one out yerself.)

In vino, veritas.
“Have another drink, senator.”

Insula Gilliganis
Gilligan’s Island

Ita erat quando hic adveni.
It was that way when I got here.

Labera lege…
Read my lips…

Lagunculae leydianae non accedunt.
Batteries not included.

Lege atque lacrima.
Read ‘em and weep.

Lex clavatoris designati rescindenda est.
The designated hitter rule has got to go.

Lingua speciem involutam praebet, sed sat cito eam comprehendes.
It looks like a tricky language, but you’ll get the hang of it pretty quickly.

Log floggit cum palma folliculus.
If you don’t stop it, you’ll go blind.

Magister Mundi sum!
I am the Master of the Universe!

Magnus frater spectat te…
Big Brother is watching you….

Mater tua criceta fuit, et pater tuo redoluit bacarum sambucus.
Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries.

Me transmitte sursum, Caledoni!
Beam me up, Scotty!

Mellita, domi adsum.
Honey, I’m home.

Mihi ignosce. Cum homine de cane debeo congredi.
Excuse me. I’ve got to see a man about a dog.

Minutus cantorum, minutus balorum, minutus carborata descendum pantorum.
A little song, a little dance, a little seltzer down your pants.

Modo fac.
Just do it.

Monstra mihi pecuniam!
Show me the money!

Motorolus interruptus.
Hold on, I’m going into a tunnel.

Muertes impendum pro saxophones.
Kenny G. must die.

Ne auderis delere orbem rigidum meum!
Don’t you dare erase my hard disk!

Neutiquam erro.
I am not lost.

Nihil curo de ista tua stulta superstitione.
I’m not interested in your dopey religious cult.

Nihil declaro.
I have nothing to declare.

Nihil est–in vita priore ego imperator Romanus fui.
That’s nothing–in a previous life I was a Roman Emperor.

No Quid Pro Quo.
I’m Sorry, We’re All Out of Quid.

Noli Intrare
Keep Out

Noli me vocare, ego te vocabo.
Don’t call me, I’ll call you.

Noli nothis permittere te terere.
Don¹t let the bastards get you down.

Noli Perturbare
Do Not Disturb

Nolo Contendere.
Hillary, you’re on your own.

Non calor sed umor est qui nobis incommodat.
It’s not the heat, it’s the humidity.

Non sum pisces.
I am not a fish.

Nucleo predicus dispella conducticus.
Remove foil before microwaving.

(At a poetry reading)
Nullo metro compositum est.
It doesn’t rhyme. ….

Non curo. Si metrum non habet, non est poema.
I don’t care. If it doesn’t rhyme, it isn’t a poem.

Numquam solus ambulabatis.
You’ll never walk alone.

Nunc est bibendum.
Now is the time for drinking.

Nunc Tutus Exitus Computarus.
It’s Now Safe To Turn Off Your Computer.

Nupperinme de Gallia huc volavi! Mehercule, bracchia mea defatiga sunt!
I just flew in from Gaul, and boy, are my arms tired!

O! Plus! Perge! Aio! Hui! Hem!
Oh! More! Go on! Yes! Ooh! Ummm!

Phy! Fabulae!
Bah! Humbug!

Postatem obscuri lateris nescitis.
You do not know the power of the dark side.

Prehende uxorem meam, sis!
Take my wife, please!

Purgamentum init, exit purgamentum.
Garbage in, garbage out.

Quantum materiae materietur marmota monax si marmota monax materiam possit materiari?
How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?

Quaeso esto meus vicinus.
Please won’t you be my neighbor.

Qualem muleirculam!
What a bimbo!

Qualem blennum!
What a doofus!

Quando omni flunkus (?) moritati.
When all else fails, play dead.

Quanti canicule ille in finestere?
How much is that doggie in the window?

Quantum in ura hora imputas?
You charge how much an hour?

Quid? Me anxius sum?
What? Me worry?

Quis fuit ille personatus?
Who was that masked man?

Quo signo nata es?
What’s your sign?

Quomodo cogis comas tuas sic videri?
How do you get your hair to do that?

Radix lecti
Couch potato

Raptus regaliter
Royally screwed

Re vera, cara mea, mea nil refert.
Frankly, my dear, I don’t give a damn.

Re vera, potas bene.
Say, you sure are drinking a lot.

Revelare Pecunia!
Show Me The Money!

Revera linguam latinam vix cognovi.
I don¹t really know all that much Latin.

Romani quidem artem amatoriam invenerunt.
You know, the Romans invented the art of love.

Sane, paululum linguae Latinae dico.
Sure, I speak a little Latin.

Semper ubi sub ubi.
Always wear underwear. (So incorrect it’s funny…)

Sentio aliquos togatos contra me conspirare.
I think some people in togas are plotting against me.

Sharpei diem.
Sieze the Wrinkle Dog.

Si Archibus Omnibus come, ego vometo.
If I eat an Arch Deluxe, I’ll puke.

Si fractum non sit, noli id reficere.
If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it.

Si hoc legere scis, nimium eruditionis habes.
If you can read this, you have to much education.

Si hoc signum legere potes, operis boni in rebus Latinus alacribus et fructuosis potiri potes!
If you can read this sign, you can get a good job in the fast-paced, high-paying world of Latin!

Si non vittet, accuittere debetis.
If it doesn’t fit, you must acquit.

Si tu id aeficas, ei venient. Ager Somnia
If you build it, they will come. Field of Dreams

Sic faciunt omnes.
Everyone is doing it.

Sic friatur crustulum.
Thus, the cookie crumbles.

Sic semper tyrannus.
Your dinosaur is ill.

Sit vis nobiscum.
May the force be with you.

Sola lingua bona est lingua mortua.
The only good language is a dead language.

Solum potestis prohibere ignes silvarum.
Only you can prevent forest fires.

Sona si Latine loqueris.
Honk if you speak Latin.

Spero nos familiares mansuros.
I hope we’ll still be friends.

Stultus est sicut stultus facit.
Stupid is as stupid does.

Sum, ergo edo.
I am, therefore I eat.

Tam exanimis quam tunica nehru fio.
I am as dead as the nehru jacket.

Tauri in decurso
Bulls on parade

Te audire no possum. Musa sapientum fixa est in aure.
I can’t hear you. I have a banana in my ear.

Te precor dulcissime supplex!
Pretty please with a cherry on top!

Tempo fugit.
I drove my Ford off a bridge.

Tempus incognitum.
Time unknown.

Tempis Macarena Fugit.
Time flies when you’re doing the Macarena.

Tibi Gratiad Agimus Quod Nihil Fumas
Thank you for not smoking

Totum dependeat.
Let it all hang out.

Tua mater gartet excitos calcios.
Your mom wears army boots.

Ubi est mea anaticula cumminosa?
Where’s my rubber ducky?

Uno viso, omnia visa sunt.
Seen one, seen ‘em all.

Ut si!
As if!

Utinam barbari spatium proprium tuum invadant!
May barbarians invade your personal space!

Utinam coniurati te in foro interficiant!
May conspirators assassinate you in the mall!

Utinam logica falsa tuam philosophiam totam suffodiant!
May faulty logic undermine your entire philosophy!

Vacca foeda!
Stupid cow!

Vah! Denuone Latine loquebar? Me ineptum. Interdum modo elabitur.
Oh! Was I speaking Latin again? Silly me. Sometimes it just sort of slips out.

Veni, vidi, Pesci.
I came, I saw, I moidered da bum.

Veni, veni, veni!
I came, I came, I came!

Veni Vedi Velcro.
I came. I saw. I stuck around.

Veni, vedi, vichy.
I came, I saw, I capitulated to the Germans.

Veni, Vedi, Visa.
I came, I saw, I bought it!

Vescere bracis meis.
Eat my shorts.

Ventis secundis, tene cursum.
Go with the flow.

Vidistine nuper imagines moventes bonas?
Seen any good movies lately?

Viri sunt Viri.
Men are slime.

Visne saltare? Viam Latam Fungosam scio.
Do you want to dance? I know the Funky Broadway.

Volo comparare nonnulla tegumembra.
I’d like to buy some condoms.

Wal*mart. Semper.
Wal*mart. Always.

Willum fibium comum tupeum.
Clinton lies like a rug!

The Seven Dwarfs

Fatuus
Dopey

Medicullus
Doc

Severus
Grumpy

Beatus
Happy

Somniculosus
Sleepy

Verecundus
Bashful