Dear Civilians,
We know that the current state of affairs in our great nation have many civilians up in arms and excited to join the military. For those of you who can’t join, you can still lend a hand. Here are a few of the areas we would like your assistance with:
- The next time you see an adult talking (or wearing a hat) during the playing of the National Anthem … kick their ass.
- When you witness firsthand someone burning the American Flag in protest… kick their ass.
- Regardless of the rank they held while they served, pay the highest amount of respect to all veterans. If you see anyone doing otherwise, quietly pull them aside and explain how these Veterans fought for the very freedom they bask in every second. Enlighten them on the many sacrifices these Veterans made to make this Nation great. Then hold them down while a Disabled Veteran kicks their ass.
- (GUYS) If you were never in the military, DO NOT pretend that you were. Wearing battle dress uniforms (BDU’s), telling others that you used to be “Special Forces,” and collecting GI Joe memorabilia, might have been okay if you were still seven. Now, it will only make you look stupid and get your ass kicked.
- Next time you come across an Air Force member, do not ask them, “Do you fly a jet?” Not everyone in the Air Force is a pilot. Such ignorance deserves an ass kicking (children are exempt).
- If you witness someone calling the U.S. Coast Guard non military, inform them of their mistake…and kick their ass.
- Roseanne Barr’s singing of the National Anthem is not a blooper…it was a disgrace and disrespectful. Laugh, and sooner or later your ass will be kicked.
- Next time Old Glory (U.S. flag) prances by during a parade, get on your damn feet and pay homage to her by placing your hand over your heart. Quietly thank the military member or veteran lucky enough to be carrying her…of course, failure to do either of those could earn you a severe ass kicking.
- What Jane Fonda did during the Vietnam War makes her the enemy. The proper word to describe her is “traitor.” Just mention her nomination for “Woman of the Year” and get your ass kicked.
- Don’t try to discuss politics with a military member or a veteran. We are Americans and we all bleed the same regardless of our party affiliation. Our Chain of Command, is to include our commander in Chief. The President (for those who didn’t know) is our CIC regardless of political party. We have no inside track on what happens inside those big important buildings where all those representatives” meet. All we know is that when those civilian representatives screw up the situation, they call upon the military to go straighten it out. The military member might direct you to Oliver North. (I can see him kicking your ass already.)
- “Your mama wears combat boots” never made sense to me … stop saying it! If she did, she would most likely be a vet and probably kick your ass!
- Bin Laden and the Taliban are not communists, so stop saying “Let’s go kill those Commie’s!!!” And stop asking us where he is!!!! Crystal balls are not standard issue in the military. That reminds me … if you see anyone calling those damn psychic phone numbers; let me know, so I can go kick their ass.
- Flyboy (Air Force), Jar Head (Marines), Grunt (Army), Squid (Navy) etc, are terms of endearment we use describing each other. Unless you are a service member or vet, you have not earned the right to use them. Could get your ass kicked.
- Last but not least, whether or not you become a member of the military, support our troops and their families. Every Thanksgiving and religious holiday that you enjoy with family and friends please remember that there are, literally, thousands of sailors and troops far from home wishing they could be with their families. Thank God for our military and the sacrifices they make every day. Without them, our country would get its ass kicked.
Chris – I am sorry to hear about your Uncle. Too much history is lost with people like your Uncle. At least you have his stories to pass on and in this he will always be remembered.
Thank you, bitscared. I could spend hours relating his stories. Some were funny, some were frightening, all were fascinating. And all need to be passed on, you’re right. My family treasures them all.
Yes AD, I was “paying attention” to Chris’s post as well as yours. As I saw it, Chris stated his case without displaying the typical leftist need to dictate to others how their feeling or thoughts are wrong. What I’m saying AD is that while I might or might not agree with Chris’s point of view he seems content to state his case, feelings, state of mind, etc…and allow you to make up your own mind about what he has to say. You on the other hand can’t seem to get past the sanctimonious posturing and pontificating.
Yes, Gary. Beating up your countrymen while they are peacefully protesting IS WRONG. My saying so is not “leftist dictation”. It’s my freedom of expression, which oddly enough is the astonishingly embattled topic at hand. Funny how you totally missed the gargantuan “fascist dictation” represented by the imperialist bully who proudly boasts that he’ll hospitalize anyone who he deems has offended his superior caste. Nothing to say on that point? I’m not surprised. You don’t seem like the protesting sort. Pick up that can, citizen.
Good night AD, I’ve enjoyed the debate but I stand by my opinion. I believe you to be a shrill, sanctimonious, pontificating fool. But as a fellow American, I say God Bless ya.
A little more opinion: Out of every comment on this post I like what Chick said best of all… “If you won’t stand behind our troops, feel free to stand in front of them. Hooo-Ahhh! Selah
Good night, Gary. Thanks for being an awesome example for my purposes.
Oh Goodness. You guys take me too seriously. PEOPLE! Get a sense of humor already! … or I’ll kick your ass!
I agree this is an awesome page and i laughed lots but i have one problem worth mentioning. No. 13 is admittedly just part of the joke but isn’t that along the same lines as African-Americans and the N-word? Don’t a lot of us have a problem with that dublestandard?